About the cartoonist
by jpitts84

Jared Pitts was born and raised in a filthy one-room shack on the Navajo reservation, and didn't own a pair of pants until he was 14 years old. Without money for food or clothing, he and his 9 inbred siblings were forced to steal beer and cigarettes at gunpoint and sell them on the street for a nominal profit. They also sold a crude mixture of hair spray and rubbing alcohol called "Ocean Breeze" to the bums who lived behind Wong Lee's Take-out-Chinese and Laundromat. After his gambling and cock fighting rings were busted by the Federales, "Rico," (as he was known at the time) was able to avoid federal ass-pounding prison by snitching on his business associates and enrolling at the Northwest College of Art. There he graduated Super Awesome Magna Cum Laude with a BFA in Fine Art, Illustration and Astrozoobiology. He currently has a $50,000 bounty on his head by the Mexican Mafia, and resides above a bowling alley with his 7 wives in the western United States, the greatest goddamn country on the face of the Earth or ANYWHERE ELSE!

He can also punch a cannonball out of the sky.